“The only thing we never get enough of is love; and the only thing we never give enough of is love.” – Henry Miller.
We often begin our personal development journeys because we feel we need more or lack something. Often, it is the pain of where and how we are that drives us to seek growth.
But what many of us fail to realise is that personal development is not the same as acquiring more, or even success.
putting your imperfect authentic self into the world invites the necessary feedback that helps you build a less imperfect authentic self.
The paradox is this: because being wrong publicly sucks, you become right faster by being wrong publicly.
You won’t find great friends in the library, church, or some group. You become a great person, and then great people resonate with you wherever you are. But, more importantly, you help yourselves stay great.
It is not always easy
Here is the thing, deep down we know we are not perfect. It is impossible to be perfect. No one has looks, finances, relationships, and all nailed to the T (at least, not all the time). And even those who manage to score high in seemingly all domains of their lives, do so at a great cost – they are under constant pressure; and in some cases, might even feel a sort of second-hand embarrassment from those around them who think this whole charade of perfection is absolute madness and want to just be themselves.
the best thing about you can also be the worst thing about you, because every trait we value has a counterpart we struggle to accept.
The extraordinary qualities you admire in others often come with a shadow side that’s harder to acknowledge. Just like one person’s guardian angel may be another’s angel of death.
Our world has often divided itself into two major archetypes: leaders and followers.
The leaders come up with ideas, take charge, and guide others. And the followers stand behind them, supporting their ideas, sometimes building a cult-like allegiance, so strongly that they’ll do whatever it takes to spread and defend their cherished beliefs.
They have always tried to reveal themselves to me in fragments, but my own expectations have often warped my interpretation of their intentions. I’ve seen them as malevolent at times, and indifferent at others. But this year, I guess I was able to see that it was all beyond good and bad, and about shaping me into someone better.
You see, every word we speak is laden with meaning. It is the stories of people captured in syllables. It’s events that have happened over and over again. And the experiences of my friends, no matter how unique they might seem (to them or even me), are ubiquitous to humanity. This is also true for my experiences, your experiences, or the experiences of anyone really…
We all embody experiences. When we interact with others we create even more experiences. From the way we look and communicate to the way we move and make love, there is a ripple of gestures and feelings that can generate delight or displeasure. And, at the extremes of these experiences, there is love and hate. … Read more
Distance has a way of testing you in ways that no amount of effort can fix. Miscommunication happens. Timing feels off. Sexual needs can strain the bond. Circumstances beyond your control create cracks where none existed before. It’s not because you didn’t try hard enough. It’s because love, as beautiful as it is, doesn’t exist outside reality. And sometimes, reality can be against you.
