The human mind is a wonderful thing, one minuet you think you can leap off a story
building the next you’re standing there frozen right at the edge of the building, this is because your mind has already made the decision not to leap off a building, but you were not aware of this
I believe you are very intelligent, I believe you have great imaginative power, I just need your help here in creating the perfect scene to illustrate this idea, it’s going to aid you understand how to deal with Impulsive behaviours, so here we go:
Imagine a global gathering was held, so that every human from every race and continent was to attend ..imagine that everyone gathered in circular format, so that the whole world was facing on single point, let us imagine that there was a high tower built on that point so that everyone could look and see the tower, again let us imagine that the world was flat so that every human can at once see the tower
Now, with the whole world standing transfixed to the high tower, imagine that someone, let us say an alien of higher intelligence or something like that, stood at the top of the mountain and asked “how many of you do things based on how you feel that very moment without considering the feature implications” (a fancy way of saying how many of you act impulsively)
I’m pretty sure people won’t jump up and raise their hands in excitement …But why not?
Answer: they feel that being impulsive is a negative attribute and they won’t like to be associated with such characteristics
However, being impulsive isn’t particularly a bad thing, as a matter of fact with due consideration one can see the good in being impulsive but that’s a topic for another day
UNDERSTANDING YOUR NATURE
Ludwig Borne once said that “getting rid of a delusion would make us wiser than getting hold of a truth”, he was very correct
Think of it, have you ever given to someone something you cherished or didn’t really plan to handout, and at another instant refused to give something even if it you didn’t really have any need of it?
The thing is Humans Are Emotional creatures, we may use logic a lot in our lives to solve problems but we are at our core all emotional creatures, darn!! it’s the reason we fall in Love, Trust people and even Hate people
They say people are impulsive, they are right, and that’s a good thing.
If Humans are cars, emotions are the Drivers…based on the Latin word “ēmōtus”, emotions actually mean to excite or agitate…
Someone who just lost a lot of money is most likely to slap someone who stepped on his feet than someone who just won a lottery, People are most likely to make out when the lights are dim and the weather is cool than when its bright and very hot, like when the sun is out (Nigerian sunshine, not that of Norway)
On a serious note, you might think its impulsive but it goes way beyond the shallow definition of the word. Understanding that your impulsive actions can be altered is a game changer. What if you can optimise your impulsive actions to yield more profitable outcomes. GOOD NEWS: you can optimise your impulsive actions
I made a video where I gave the viewers three seconds to choose between landing a slap to the cheek of their religious head or to their parent informing them that there was a gun to their heads
Whatever the choice was, it was clearly based on the way they felt about these two personalities. Consider a situation where the parent has been a particularly nice and loving person, the chances are that the slap would tilt towards the cheek of the religious leader with whom they have less personal relationship with, However if the Individual has found solace in the teachings of the religious leader , so that he even considers his parents Unworthy of his religious standards the slap is most likely going to land in the parents cheek…Of course most people would rather have themselves shot in the head than make this terrible decision( no pun intended)
HERE IS THE SOLUTION
Impulses are triggered by emotions and emotions are triggered by preferences (mostly subconscious)
What is most valuable to you and why?
This question can unravel many things, like how much insult can you take, how much negligence can you bear, how much pain can you suffer for something or someone, and so on.
It is always helpful to answer this question earlier, and if you don’t like any of the answers, question its reasons and then state the new answer you want, its always better to have you mind made up beforehand.
However, the true solution to dealing with impulsive behaviours lies in Understanding yourself, what other tools can you use other than Meditations, Mindfulness and books
Practicing Mediations and Mindfulness is something that might seem awkward, especially in this century, we only see monks doing it in the movies, but this is in fact a useful tool used by most successful people, I know because I’ve read them say it a lot in their books…
It would require you stepping away from the fuss, and taking another step away from your yourself(thoughts), so that you are left in complete silence, both of environment and Mind, and then you allow your energy to flow through you …it is in these moments of complete calmness that we come to stunning realizations, realizations to things like why we always yell at our siblings or children or why we can’t just help feeling Horney around a person and so on…
So I urge you to make out time today to optimise yourself, let your leg jerk action be triggered from the right emotions for the right reasons, remember they are yours (your emotions), you can only tame them, you can never destroy them
Another step to take is to grasp more knowledge about your very nature. Life is too short for one single individual to gain all the necessary experiences to carry out any ground breaking feat…Humans recognized this thousands of years ago and started cave arts, today every thing has been modernized, information’s are now stored in books, videos and tapes…
Get hold of and consume as much content as possible, you would gain vicarious knowledge and slowly yet steadily you’ll be amazed how much your life would change, and soon you’ll be exactly who you want (or wanted to be, because you must have by then discovered a more amiable nature you wish to attain)
I’ll recommend you checkout the Books Mindfulness by Ellen J. Langer and How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie
These books are great in dealing with impulsive behaviours because, they would aid you in seeing the bigger picture both in your environment and relationship with others
I hope you found the article helpful, if you have any questions or suggestions do well to drop it at the comment section, feel free to shear the article. Thanks
P.S: this was from experience and I am still refining myself