It usually happens whenever I’m tired.
When exhausted and in dire need of sleep, when my muscles are weak and my brain threatens to short down. I discover that I am most irritable – I am most irrational.
Maybe it is because of my heightened awareness of my frailty. When you have a mind that is wide awake and a drowsy body, you begin to notice the incongruities in life.
You begin to realize that although your mind is boundless, free, and powerful, it is trapped inside a feeble body.
In those moments of extreme weakness, I hear my heart palpitate gently. I hear my breath flowing through my nostrils – filling my lungs.
In moments like this, I can taste my saliva and feel the charges on my skin.
My mind wanders afar off. It thinks about all the places I dream of going to. All the things I wish I’ve done. But I do not regret it – it is simply a longing for more of life. At least, I still have time, don’t I?
But then the strangest of things happen.
I’m an artist, writer, and thinker. I also love reading and playing chess.