It is frustrating when people try to control us, it is even more frustrating when the people we rely on for food and shelter are the ones trying to restrict our every move, telling us what to do and what not to do, argh!! So frustrating, because the thing is, our parents can be wrong, our parents can be difficult sometimes, and sometimes they can bad for us because the experience is not the best teacher.
They always come up with the word “experience”, telling us we know nothing (which of course is wrong, right?)
Nobody knows everything, not even billionaires (about money) or the clergymen (about divinity), and we all have something we have little or no idea about, and most times those who claim they do, don’t have the full knowledge of that field (this is because life is limitless)
We are all like Plants, we grow, all at a different pace with different qualities, some having beauty, other height, while others strength. We are all distinguished beings
However, it is wise to follow the path of people who have similar interest with us, or who have gone through exactly what we are about or are going through
for instance, let me shear a story
When I was like nine years old, I didn’t like being around girls, I didn’t have any particular interest in them. It always fascinated me how the girls were so serious about covering their nakedness, sincerely speaking I considered it quite disgusting.
I would always stand in awe wondering why the elderly males would keep running after the girls, and it would literally piss me off when I’m asked to assist in the hunt for the ladies.
Fast forward a few years later, guess who is drooling at the ladies (Puberty, why?)
BACK TO THE “EXPERIENCE” STUFF
So there you have it, I like girls too (not my fault, blame puberty)
My point is, I was both right and darn wrong in my perception of girls at my young age (and I do think most guys did go through this phase of life), Parents would always control us because they think they “know” what would happen “next”, because they can see the bigger picture, the things we cannot perceive, not because we lack the tools necessary for the perception but because we just haven’t gone through the “Puberty” of that aspect of life, however, they are not always right, especially when the aspect we are venturing into has nothing to do with their set of experiences
In this post, I explained how life is full of choices, and if we are to go far we need the right advice, not simply those of our parents (your desired destination and theirs’ may not just be the same)
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no one knows everything but everyone knows something
Everyone is both right and wrong
When it comes to life, time needs to be given in order for anything to be mastered, however, the experience isn’t ALWAYS necessary
yes you read that right, the experience isn’t necessary anymore and it is straight-up unhelpful for everything to be hinged on experience because while it might be necessary for time to be spent practicing something, it is totally nuts to desire an “experience” of something you could probably learn from the experienced…
the early men spent valuable time making fire and even longer time trying to teach their prodigies how to make the same fire, but this days by compressing the knowledge of our ancestors we have made match sticks, and not even our parents know the chemical composition of a match stick (why should they?).
Experience is a very painful and wasteful endeavor, why let a child dip his hand in acid when you can just show him what it does and freak him out.
Nothing beats education— letting the other person fully understand what and why. There’s a word in the dictionary for this pattern of learning, it’s “VICARIOUS LEARNING”.
VICARIOYSLY LEARNING BEATS EXPERIENCE
Vicarious knowledge means lessons we learn from another person’s experience(s). This is actually the main reason the internet was invented, to enable people to shear their experiences/research when these experiences are sheared it speeds things up by improving our choices, lessening our mistakes and drastically reducing unnecessary repetitions
IF MY PARENTS ARE WRONG, AND I AM WRONG, THEN WHO DO I LISTEN TO?
Considering the fact that both you and your parents could be potentially wrong due to lack of “puberty” in one or more aspects of life, it is thus wise to seek the knowledge Vicariously in Books
Humans are immortal, we conquered death, we created books, now we have the opportunity to continue right from the point we left off, all the knowledge we took our lifetime or several lifetimes to acquire can now be condensed into the volume of a single book, a book that can be consumed in just a matter of hours,
Did you know, kids these days know about more principles in physics than Albert Einstein, not because they have more experience, but simply because they have the entire LIFE of Albert in a single book, a LIFE they can continue
it is a demented idea to desire to experience when all the knowledge could be gotten from a book
topics ranging from sex, religion, politics, physics and so on, are tackled in books, with this vast library of knowledge made available to us it is simply wise to acquire knowledge, life would be made much easier and better
However, it is dangerous to acquire a false knowledge (but that’s a topic for another day)
THE BIG PICTURE (experience is not the best teacher)
We were thought about the life cycle of butterflies, we know when they are in the larva stage, when they are in the pupa stage, when they leave the cocoon, when they start flying, when they start mating and when they finally die off…
simple right? what if I told you, your life is also so easily observable and predictable (Facebook is already doing it) like I said Puberty showed me the power of Life, life moves with a wave, a wave you’ll be wise to flow with because it’s just simply futile to resist
THIS IS HOW TO USE “EXPERIENCE”
- Accept that you can be awful wrong about a lot of things
- Understand that even adults can be wrong (a lot of times as well)
- Seek vicarious Knowledge
- Be careful where you source for information
- Seek advice from professionals who have gained the “experience”
- If possible research the advice of the professionals (they are usually less wrong)
- Be willing to crisscross every unhelpful belief or thought
- Take note of your “experiences”
- Add to the Library of “experiences”, and as much as you can keep it vicarious
- Always review your “experiences”
Hopefully I didn’t confuse anyone, hopefully a seven-year-old would read this and prepare for puberty coughs
There’s a saying in Nigeria (especially the Igbos), it goes this way: “what an elder sat down to see, even if a child climbs a palm tree he cannot see it”
Do you think to agree that children can also gain that ability of foreseeing events by gaining vicarious knowledge (let me know your opinions in the comment section)
A Self-Help Writer And Editor Who Keeps It Simple (Yet Elegant)