The Character Crisis: Are You Part of What’s Wrong With Society?

A few weeks ago, a friend wished a (corrupt) politician a happy birthday, and that disconcerted me so much that I had to confront them.

Nigeria is not like the United States, where you may have politicians with conflicting ideologies, but overall “good intent for their people”. Here, most of these politicians aim to loot, intimidate, and sustain power to the detriment of the future of millions.

When I asked what they liked about the politician, they said, “His charisma.“

I was troubled. I felt what Euripides must have felt when he said: “When one with honeyed words but evil mind persuades the mob, great woes befall the state.”

I didn’t bother proceeding to grill them on how terrible the said politician was. You know, it is like when you have a kid who struggles to read or tackle calculus, and you immediately know they have yet to fully grasp phonics or algebra. Much like the struggling kid, to not see that the said politician should not be celebrated, but in fact arrested, indicates a severe gap in their sense of fairness and morality.

Desmond Tutu once said, “If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.” Sometimes, celebrating a criminal is as good as supporting them. And that tells a lot…

The counter-argument that “everyone has flaws, and so we must not judge” is an idea I intend to break through the rest of this piece, not just because it justifies the corruption eating up Africa, but because it’s a psychological trick called “moral disengagement”—where people use nice-sounding phrases to avoid acknowledging evil. It’s how someone says, “like him or hate him, you have to respect his hustle or doings” while ignoring that the “hustle” or “Doings” is theft and the “hate” exists because he’s destroying lives. It is the equivalent of not educating that kid on phonics and algebra simply because you lack understanding of copywriting or accounting.

This piece is not an attack, but a revelation.

Mirror Mirror on The Wall: What Your Heroes Reveal About Your Heart

A few weeks ago, I was telling my elder brother that the story of Jesus, or any religious figure, really, is NOT one story. It is simply a mirror that reflects the reader’s heart: The violent person would always reference and draw inspiration from the scene of Jesus whipping people at the temple. The forgiving would always reference and draw inspiration from the scene of Jesus rebuking Peter for lopping off the soldier’s ear. The extravagant would always reference and draw inspiration from the scene of Jesus endorsing the cleansing of his feet with alabaster oil. We can go on and on, but you get the idea.

While most people claim to be learning, what they are actually doing is mirroring and justifying – seeking confirmation of what aligns with their soul. This is more or less how you get terrorists and peacemakers, greedy and charitable, violent and peaceful, all quoting exactly the same “Holy Book(s)”.

“We don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are” – Anaïs Nin

When that friend was celebrating the (corrupt) politician, it was not necessarily the wrongdoings of the politician that troubled me, but the fact that it suggested that that friend might value power, authority, and material success over good character.

I am not just judging this friend based on one instance. This year, there was the birthday of another famous politician – Peter Obi – who has a clean track record, and most of the clear-thinking Nigerians – those not consumed by religious differences or tribalism – wished to be president. This friend didn’t celebrate this person. I bet, if I ask their opinion about said politician, they won’t be able to say he is not a good man, but will point to some other personal dislike or express indifference.

I write this with pain in my heart, but that there is the problem of Africans — Nigerians to be precise. Too many of us don’t resonate with the kind, moral, or competent, which suggests a lack of those very traits in us — a character crisis.

“Every other country of the world resists bad governance, but in Nigeria, it is celebrated. It’s only in Nigeria that you can become a governor, local government chairman, and people see you doing what is obviously wrong and continue to praise you” — Peter Obi

Recently, David Ifeanyi shared a post with me written by Lauren Chen where she explained in painful details how people often say that “The developing world is poor because the Western World colonized them and stole their resources“, yet “over the past century, the developing world has, for the most part, shown that they are completely incapable of harnessing their own resources.” She further went on to explain that, “They [the developing world] are poor because they do not know how to run and administer their own countries, resources be damned.“

If this doesn’t break your heart, I don’t know what else will. Think about it, Nigeria has generated trillions of dollars in oil revenue since 1960, yet as of 2026, roughly 62% of the population is projected to live in poverty. Research by Nobel laureates Acemoglu and Robinson shows that countries with corrupt ‘extractive institutions’—where leaders loot rather than build—can have GDP per capita 30 to 40 times lower than countries with fair institutions. But here’s the most troubling statistic: surveys, polls and studies still show that approximately one-third of Nigerian businesses believe corruption is “the price for getting things done”. When a system normalises theft and celebrates the thieves, is it any wonder we remain poor despite our wealth?”

Seeing People For Who They Are: Actions Reveal Character

It’s cliched, but actions speak louder than words. Once you understand that, you stop being interested in what most people say or explain, but rather what their actions say and explain about them.

It tells a lot when someone lies on their CV, cheats on their partner, refuses to support a struggling friend, keeps quiet when their brother rapes someone, applauds those who lynch someone for blasphemy, or celebrates a politician who embezzles public funds and rigs elections.

These aren’t just mistakes or differences of opinion. These are revelations of character. Because here is the thing. Those actions tell you all you need to know about their sense of honesty, loyalty, compassion, justice, dignity, or fairness.

And, like Theodore Roosevelt once said, “No man is justified in doing evil on the ground of expedience.” We can’t keep justifying things that are immoral or wrong simply because they bring money (Yahoo), give access (Bribery), make us happy (Drugs), or whatever reason.

“There’s something wrong with your character if opportunity controls your loyalty.” – Trent Shelton

While no one is perfect, and all these exist on a spectrum – no one is 100% honest all the time, neither is everyone 100% compassionate either – it still tells you how far down many Africans are on the spectrum, and even more scary, the direction they are heading, their orientation.

It is worse when they are willing to defend and even fight you for pointing out the issue. Go to social media and see what is happening: young men adoring criminals and psychopaths in the name of success, young ladies supporting prostitutes and morons in the name of feminism, religious folks supporting clergy and manipulators in the name of piety, and countless others supporting corrupt politicians who stagnate and strangle society in the name of loyalty.

“The disposition to admire, and almost to worship, the rich and the powerful, and to despise, or, at least, to neglect persons of poor and mean condition…is the great and most universal cause of the corruption of our moral sentiments.” – Adam Smith

Social psychology research confirms what Adam Smith observed: societies that celebrate power and wealth over character and fairness create the conditions for their own stagnation. Studies show that when just 20-30% of a population publicly endorses a behaviour, in this case “corrupt behaviour”, it eventually becomes normalised across the entire society. Every birthday post, every celebration of a corrupt politician, draws us closer to this…Nigeria now ranks 140th out of 180 countries in the 2024 Corruption Perceptions Index.

All these lead to a tricky situation that often leaves you distancing yourself from even loved ones, not out of moral superiority or intellectual arrogance, but for fear of being called self-righteous, judgmental, hypocritical, a hater, or even an enemy.

In truth, I would have published this piece last year, but I had to delay because of the fear of losing friendships or coming out too strongly. So I edited, softened my tone, and tried to point out the issues. But, even now, I fear that once more, people would only be able to see what they are capable of seeing, and no change would happen.

Conclusion: If We Want a Better Society, We Must First Fix Our Hearts.

I agree that there is no perfect person. There are always struggles. What matters is the orientation that has been taken.

A person who is oriented right will treat women with respect, even if years of conditioning prime them to objectify women. They will choose to honour fairness even if they find power tempting. And, they will do the right thing, even if they wanted the wrong thing. All these are internal conflicts I share, and I strive to curb by writing to understand, giving room to calm down, and reminding myself I am only human.

Like Dr. Gordon Livingston once said, “We are not what we think, or what we say, or how we feel. We are what we do.”

The question isn’t whether you have some darkness. Everyone does. The question is: What are you doing with it? Are you wrestling with it, or are you feeding it? Are you oriented upwards towards being a better person, or are you oriented downwards towards becoming worse as long as it gives you your wishes?

Because here is the thing: at the end, we find ourselves in the society we built for ourselves. If we want a better society, we must first fix our hearts.

And, I hope more people realise this, including my friend.

“Human greatness does not lie in wealth or power, but in character and goodness.” – Anne Frank

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Here are some other pieces you might find interesting: 

• African Renaissance: Why the Battle for a Better Africa Starts With Your Thinking
• How Good Values Lead to Bad Actions: Doing Right When It’s Hard to Do 
• Shape-Shifting Reality: Why The World Is a Mirror [and How To Reflect More Good]
• Preparing For Greener Pastures: The Value of Personal Development, Even When You Have Nothing To Show For It
• Crafting a Better Nigeria: Why Your Work Should Be More Than A Means To Money